college tip#55

i used a men's restroom. a public one. it was completely accidental. i was at the institute & felt the urge. so i hurried to the bathroom, pushed open the door, picked a stall & went about my business. when all was done, i pushed open the stall door. walked to the sink. a completely natural, everyday thing. (at least it'd better be.) and as i was washing my hands. i sang the ABC's. to be sure i was thorough. when i noticed the coloring of the tiled walls had been changed from a pale pink to a pale blue. huh. then i looked at myself in the mirror and my eyes boggled. i was putting two and two together. blue...oddly shaped toilets...man at the oddly shaped toilet. yes. a men's restroom. awesome.

naturally, i had to act calm and collected. as sylvia plath wrote in her novel, the bell jar,

if you do something incorrect... with a certain arrogance, as if you knew perfectly well you were doing it properly, you can get away with it & nobody will think you are bad-mannered or poorly brought up (or stupid). they will think you are original and very witty.

so. i took sylvia plath to heart. and pretended i meant to be in the men's restroom, that i was simply trying something out. to see what i preferred. i finished washing my hands, the man at the urinal didn't turn. i dried my hands. he still stood rooted before the porcelain. i fluffed my hair in the mirror and headed for the door. as i did so i threw a comment towards the boy at the urinal. he turned to me and this time it was his eyes the boggled.

yeah. go college.

& my tip is:

always check the sign outside the restroom twice.

oh &.

check this out.

i'm obsessed. best ever.

oh. and this too. (kind of reminds me of shania twain.)